Rug-Sucking Monster

8

Today is our Mommy’s Birthday! We are happy that it is on a Saturday, so we get extra snuggle time with her today. She was surprised to see her birthday announced on the Cat Blogosphere! She says thank you for all the kind birthday wishes. She just got off the phone with Gramma. Mom always calls Gramma at the time Mom was born to wish her mother a Happy Mother’s Day.

We haven’t been able to blog much lately. That’s because the computer has been overheating and shutting down randomly. So Daddy performed surgery on it. This is what he pulled out.

A furball! The computer hacked up a furball! An impressive one, if I do say so myself.

In other news, I have always thought that Cookie is a bit daft when it comes to The Rug Sucking Monster. She is not afraid of it! When it comes out, most of us go running the other direction. Clyde, One Who Came Before, would hiss at it even before it got turned on. Then he would run to the farthest corner of the house to get away from it. But not Cookie.

Watch the movie and see what I mean.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tAh297anJGg

Crazy, I tell you! That Cookie is bat sh*t crazy! What do you do when The Rug Sucking Monster comes out?


24

Greetings, furriends! My sister Cookie and I are TWO years old today!

This is what we looked like as newborns:

As Meerkat mentioned in her most recent post, Mom and Dad dragged the rug-sucking monsters around the house, and REMOVED ALL OUR FURS. Especially from the Cat Trees in the Fambly Room. As you can see in the photo below, I am very distraught about this turn of events.

Please join us for a Birthday ReFurring Party! Even though it is still winter here, we are sure that if efurryone sheds just a little, we will have the cat trees back to normal in no time!

Even if you don’t have furs, or don’t shed much, please come and enjoy the party!

We have food,

fountain drinks for the kittens and adult cat beverages for the big kittehs,

treats,

toys,

more toys,

nip

and napping spots!

Lots of napping spots!

Plus ample facilities for when you need to answer the call of nature. No long lines like at the ladies room at rock concerts!

There are two sets of stairs for games of Thundering Herds of Elephants! Each set of stairs has a landing and a turn for added interest and difficulty.

Please join us, and be prepared to SHED!!!  (Furless Cats Welcome, too!)

Purrs,

Ms. Floofs (Caramel)

and Cookie

23

hello kittehs! on tuesday morning mom and dad double teamed us – Padre, Panda Bear, and me. they stuffed Panda Bear into one PTU, and Padre and me into another. then they put us into the grey room that moves, and off we went. you know it, kittehs. we were headed to the v-e-t.

even though we had just had an ice storm. see our magnolia tree? it is completely encased in ice.

this is one of the entrances to where mommy works.

see all the ice on these trees? you can click on the photo to biggify.

nope, all that ice did not stop mom and dad from taking us to the v-e-t.  #$%^&*@! cleveland with all its snow and ice removal equipment. even though we live in the “snow belt”, our schools rarely cancel school due to weather. (however, yesterday our schools were closed because we had a blizzard.)

Panda Bear complained the whole way to the v-e-t.

when we got there, we all got weighed. they had to drag us out of our PTU’s.

Padre has lost some weight, and is down to 12.4 pounds (from 13.2 pounds last fall). Panda Bear weighs 13.0 pounds, same as last year. even though a lady is not supposed to reveal her age or her weight, well, i am almost 4 years old and i weigh 9.6 pounds, same as last year. (i guess i am more of a tomboy diva.)

mommy was actually worried that i am too skinny, but Dr. Amy reassured her that i am a healthy, normal sized cat. compared to all the other big kittehs at Casa de Furry Bambinos, i look tiny. when Cookie and Caramel were at the v-e-t a few weeks ago, their weights were 14.0 pounds for Cookie (you read that right) and 10.0 pounds for Caramel. Caramel looks bigger than that, but it’s all floof. Caramel gets so stressed by going to the v-e-t that she actually ::whispers:: pees herself in the PTU. at least none of us did that this time.

this is my boyfriendcat Padre hiding in the PTU. Padre is going to have to have dental surgery on march 31. if you could spare some purrs for Padre, we would appreciate it.

we were examined and got our shots. i yodeled a bit to make them aware of my displeasure. Panda Bear, the dork, was all calm and mellow. Dr. Amy said that when she listens to a cat’s heart rate, it is usually around 220 because we are so anxious. Panda Bear was a mellow 150. he even posed for his picture with Dr. Amy. (i think he has a crush on her.)

to add insult to injury, when we got home, mom left us to go to work, rather than stay at home and hover over us to make sure we did not have reactions to our shots. yeah, dad stayed with us, but there were three of us to observe! Cookie staged a sit-in to protest this injustice.

and then when mommy got home from work, she and daddy dragged two different rug sucking monsters around, moved furniture, and removed all our furs from our cat trees! that stoopid foster kitten Sunny is trying to be all macho and face off against the spot bot monster. doesn’t he realize it could eat him alive?

hello, ASPCA? we want to file a complaint …

and i’m supposed to say that Cookie and Caramel are having a birthday party next week to celebrate their second birthday. which is good, so that all of you can help us replace fur everywhere.

6

This is the sixth post in a series about what we did while Mom and Dad abandoned us to help Aunt Patty and Uncle Chris with the M word. Our poor cousins Rainbow, Muse, Cinnamon, Toast, and Bruiser (the woofie) had to endure being cooped up in rooms that moved for days and days. If you want to know what Mom and Dad were doing, go read their stupid blog.

Dear Mom and Dad,

We confess! We had a few friends over Friday night, August 1st. The usual suspects came over, along with some new kids on the block — Sheldon, Rae, Gordon, Tammy Faye, and who knows who else.

Everything was mellow at first. Some of the new kids started a poker game at the dining room table. Actually, it was strip poker. A few collars and soft paws were shed. When they brought out the cigars, we said no way! This is a nuclear and smoke free zone!

Another group wanted snacks so we let them have some of our leftovers. They got a little raucous and soon a food fight was happenin’! We think Gordon started it because he has kind of a bad reputation, but we don’t really want to point the paw until we know for sure. Someone pukied in a few places, but we are not sayin’ who cuz we don’t want to rat on our friends. We cleaned up best we could, but some of it is still around. On Saturday morning, August 2nd, when Aunt Deb stopped in to feed us, she wanted to use the big noisy thing that sucks up stuff, but she thought that Daddy might not like that.

Just before midnight, lots of water and light and noise came form the sky outside. We were ascairt, so we all piled up on top of each other under the sofa. After the storm ended, everyone put on their little yellow rain slickers and tiny boots and left us Furry Bambinos to ourselves. We slept until Aunt Deb came over on Saturday morning to feed us.

Panda Bear Waves Goodbye

Mom and Dad, please don’t be mad at us! We promise we will be good!

Your loving bambinos,
Panda Bear, Meerkat, and Padre

7

Last night after dinner, Daddy barricaded himself in the human litter box room and began to make an awful racket!!  There was whirring and grinding and roaring and thumping and banging that was shaking something in the walls.  I peeked in to check on him.

Peeking at Daddy handling the Metal Snake Monster

Daddy was wrassling with a Metal Snake Monster that was coming out of the drain of the human bathing tub!

I always thought that snakes just made hissing sounds, but this snake must have been very angry and was making very LOUD noises.

At first I was worried, but I could see that Daddy had won the battle with the Metal Snake Monster.  He pulled a clump of hair from the snake’s mouth and said “See, here’s the problem, Panda Bear!”  So, I sniffed it.  It smelled icky, but I knew it definitely wasn’t MY hair!

Next, Daddy cleaned the human litter box room with smelly stuff.  Then he took out the Rug Sucking Monster and attacked the carpet.  Meerkat and Padre bolted, but I stayed to watch.

After that, Daddy and Mommy went to the basement and studied the big hot box in the middle of the room. They used big words like “eevaperater” and “hyoomiduhtea” and smaller words like “new filter”.  They played with the water hose to the big hot box, and got water on the floor.  So, I sniffed it.  It smelled kinda icky.  Then they put the hose away and went back upstairs.

Humans sure do some weird stuff!

3

Sorry that we have not been blogging recently!  Mom has been too busy to help us blog much lately.  She has some really lame excuses, too:  cleaning the house for visitors, having visitors, getting sick.  Really lame excuses if you ask me.

Anyway, there have been lots of fun things going on around here lately!  Padre and Meerkat want to tell some of the stories too, so we agreed to each tell some of the things that have been going on here.

First, Mom got real busy rearranging things in the house.  She called it “tidying up”.  Well, it amounted to lots of moving things around, which of course, we had to sniff and snoopervise.  It was kind of entertaining to watch her scurry around and go up and down the stairs a lot.

Mom put newspapers into paper bags, which I climbed inside of to sniff, and to hang out in.  Mom kept adding more newspapers to the bags until I could not fit inside anymore.  And then Daddy carried the paper bags to the end of the driveway.  Daddy refers to the end of the driveway as “the curb”.  I have never personally gotten to sniff the curb, but it sounds interesting.  Then some big-ass very large truck drove by and took the paper bags away.

Now, all was well and good with the tidying up, until Mom and Daddy took out the gigantic Rug-Sucking Monster, and they took turns dragging it all over the house!  I was beginning to doubt my belief that this is a wonderful home, but I remembered that other kitties in the blogosphere also mentioned that their humans also utilize such a monster from time to time.

All this tidying up was apparently due to an impending “visit” from Aunt Patty and her boyfriend Chris.  Aunt Patty and Chris came to visit to help Mom celebrate becoming very old.  Mom said that she is now older than Jack Benny.  I dunno what she’s talking about.

Aunt Patty and Chris brought us a gift to celebrate Mom becoming very old.  It is called a mobile.  Aunt Patty said that the three kitties represent The Three Furry Bambinos!  Here is a photo of the mobile:

The Kitty Mobile

Daddy hung it from the ceiling fan thingy in the kitty feeding room.  I like to circle it and study it and think of ways to get it down.

Here is a picture of Aunt Patty holding me!

Patty and Panda Bear

Aren’t we cute together?

Aunt Patty saw some of the juicy friendly looking squirrels dining outside the back door (Mom and Dad feed the squirrels every morning).  Aunt Patty thought that the squirrels were rather, well, uh, rotund.  She said the squirrels looked as big as beavers!  She called the squirrels the “beaver squirrels”.  Here is a photo of one of the squirrels enjoying his or her breakfast:

Super-sized Squirrel

Padre, Meerkat, and I enjoyed the visit from Aunt Patty and Chris very much!