Mouse Patrol

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There is now a web site called “How to Tell if Your Cat is Plotting to Kill You“.  Unfortunately, our neurotic parental unit stumbled onto this site.  They are now paranoid that we are trying to orchestrate their demise.

::sigh::

Yes, I like to knead on Mom’s squishy belleh and get me some good lap action.

Yes, Meerkat is an expert at staring contests.

Yes, I paw at Mom’s head while she sleeps.

Yes, we hunt for mousies to offer as gifts.

So when Mom took this quiz she FREAKED OUT when she saw the results:

Is your cat plotting to kill you?

Seriously doods, why would I want to kill the Can Opener Lady or the Pooper Scooper Man?  It’s just not in our best interest.

Whatever you do, don’t let your parents take the quiz!

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Hi Efurryone! Thank you to all of you who were able to make it to my Earth Day Birthday Party! It was great to see all of you! We hope that you had a good time!

There was nip, and naps, and noms!

Friends and fun! (This is Tammy Faye, a good furriend who does not yet have a blog …)

And we had the Mother of all Mouse Patrols!

Unfortunately, both Caramel and Meerkat took things a little TOO FAR with Mouse Patrol. Now they are both Grounded for Life. Mom says they have both earned their admission into the Naughty Kitty Club.

What, prey tell, did they do to get into such BIG TROUBLE?

This should explain it.

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Exhibit C:

Kids!  Caramel is not photographed, as Mom and Dad were too stunned to realize what was happening to document it.  Caramel actually went inside the crawl space first. After Caramel came out, Dad worked on blocking the entrance. Before Dad could finish blocking the entrance, Meerkat jumped up from the washer and into the crawl space.

Speaking of Trouble (that starts with T that rhymes with C that stands for Cookie) …  Cookie is not doing too well in her Kitty Fight Club competition over at The World According to Misha.   Please vote for Cookie for cutest kitten! Contest ends at 4 pm Wednesday, April 28 New Zealand time, which is about 10 pm Tuesday, April 27 EDT.

By the way, all the movies produced by “The Furry Bambinos” are now available on YouTube.  Click to see our new YouTube channel!

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Greetings efurryone! Welcome to Casa Furry Bambino for my birthday party! Make yourselves at home!

We have stinky goodness, crunchies, and beverages! Panda Bear has graciously offered to serve as bartender! (ID required for adult kitty beverages, please!) Of course, there will be lots of nip! I am so delighted that you could come to my party!

Mom planted cat grass for us a few weeks ago, so feel free to nom nom nom!

In honor of Earth Day, Mom is going to dig in the dirt outside. She says we can help! It is Spring here in northeast O-Hi-O, and the weather is supposed to be sunny and mild!

Great napping weather! (Isn’t it always great napping weather if you’re a cat?)

Lots of interesting things to sniff in the back yard! Plus bird and squirrel watching!

Feel free to play Thundering Herds of Elephants! We have two sets of stairs – one to the basement, and one to upstairs. By the way, the powder room is in the basement.

If any of you choose to party into the evening, join us in the basement for Mouse Patrol! We will gather on the ledge at the top of the basement stairs at 8:55 pm EDT. Remember to keep your voices down, as we want to sneak up on the mousies!

Also today, my sister Cookie will be competing in Kitty Fight Club at The World According to Misha!

Photo: from Misha’s blog

Kitty Fight Club is a contest that pits two adorabubble kittens against each other for the title of cutest kitten! Cookie is nervous that she won’t get any votes at all!

Please vote for Cookie on Misha’s blog!

4

if you give Cookie a mouse, she won’t let it go.  she won’t share it with the other kittehs.  she won’t follow the protocol here at casa furry bambino, which is to SHARE the mouse.  the protocol is that we each get a turn to play with the mouse, bat it around, carry it in our teeths, you know, rough it up a little.

instead, if you give Cookie a mouse, she won’t let it go.  when the other kittehs surround her asking for their turn, Cookie will hold onto the mouse and growl.

The moral to the story is don’t give Cookie a mouse.

in other news, we are ashamed to admit that we missed giving our friend Miss Tammy Faye a proper birthday greeting.  sorry that it’s late, but here’s wishing her the best!

5

Thanks to all of you who stopped by for our House Trashing Party!  Mom and Dad really have some cleaning up to do!

In other news, yesterday morning Meerkat, Padre, and I were on Mouse Patrol!  I managed to wriggle my way into the fireplace (through a closed fireplace chain-link screen) to sniff the mousie out.  Upon my triumphant return following the mousie into the living room, I expected to receive praise and accolades for my bravery and mousing acumen.

Nope.  Instead, Mom grabbed me, and she and Dad gave me a BATH.  A human-style shower.  Complete with running water.  In the kitchen sink.

Apparently, they didn’t think I could lick myself clean.  Mommy was upset that I was no longer a tuxedo kitty, but a black cat.  (Not that there’s anything wrong with being a black cat.)

After getting me thoroughly saturated, Dad wrapped me in a soft towel and dried me off.

But I still needed to groom my furs back into place.  Especially my tail furs.

So I settled in the fambly room and began the process of realigning my furs into position. Padre was more freaked out about the whole bath thing than I was.  He came over to give me a good sniff.

Grooming grooming grooming …

Luckily, Meerkat and Padre continued the pursuit of the mousie after I was waylaid by the bath.  When Dad tried to resecure the fireplace, that’s when he finally saw the mousie.  Padre and Meerkat told Dad to just grab the mousie in his teeths.  Instead, Dad left the scene to retrieve his human style mouse catching equipment (plastic tub and flattened Cheerios box).  Dad captured the mousie in the corner of the living room.

Meerkat inspected the mousie in the plastic container.  You can tell she is really craving a taste of mouse between her teeth and gums.

Then Dad went outside and released the mousie into the garden.

I am plotting my revenge for the bath, and for the release of the mousie …

4

We have quite possibly the world’s dumbest mousies in our neighborhood. Specifically, in our basement.

Now let me first explain that as a Cat of the Cloth, I am a pacifist when it comes to prey. Sure, I will get all excited with Panda Bear and Meerkat, but I never lay a paw on the mousies. Or a tooth.

On the other paw, Meerkat and Panda Bear are warm-blooded killers. Murderers! There have been three murders in the past three days. I gave the mousies the last rites, and then said prayers for them before Daddy performed the burials.

You’d think that word would get out in the mouse community to STAY AWAY from the one-eyed monster and his sister. In the meantime, I continue to prey, er I mean, pray, for the souls of the mousies. And for the dark little souls of Panda Bear and Meerkat.

3

it was refreshing to see that all the kitties understood what i was saying in my post on monday. for the humans who just didn’t get it, i will be kind enough to translate for you:

rooty, binky, and betty, you all were correct. i wanted advice on ways to keep my pesky brother panda bear away from me when i want to enjoy a good catnip bananer, or play with a mousie that i caught, without him butting in.  my girlfriend tammy faye recommended swinging a dead chicken over my head three times.  quasi said that he would help by bringing the dead chicken, but that i would need to bring the rope to swing it with.  victor tabbycat, max, and tybalt agreed that this plan should work. kilroy the love beastie added that putting the bitey on panda bear might help, in case panda bear decides to eat the chicken.

queen snickers expressed an interest in doing her own typing as well. she posed an important question about ways to keep the keyboard keys from sticking:

Very interesting! I trying my own too, but the keys seem to lock up on me. How do you prevent this??

i recommend checking to see if your mommy has installed the evil software “pawsense”.  basically, when installed on a computer, it will sense the different style of typing distinctive to us kitties, and then freeze up. according to the pawsense web site:

PawSense is a software utility that helps protect your computer from cats. It quickly detects and blocks cat typing, and also helps train your cat to stay off the computer keyboard.

if you are using a pc, i recommend that you uninstall the pawsense software. go to the start menu, select “settings”, then “control panel”, then “add or remove programs”. a dialog box will appear. scroll through the list to select pawsense, and then click on the “change/remove” button. all gone!

pawsense is not available for macintosh computers, so if you are using a mac, like i do for most of my blogging, then something else must be the problem.

if pawsense is not the problem, then try shifting your weight from one paw to another more frequently. try holding keys down for not quite as long. let me know how it works for you!

purrrrrrrrss and happy typing! 🙂